My boss called me over to talk about it around 4:00 or so, which I was fine with because damn, I had stopped working a half hour earlier before and was just trying to look busy. Welcome distraction, whatevs. So I was at her desk until 4:30. That's another problem with my boss. You put me and her in a room together and we can gab for hours.
So then I rush back to my desk and I have to talk to a co-worker, because she's going on vacation and I had to get information from her.
Tthen I get back to my desk finally and start closing everything, packing up and then I started gathering my things and I can't find my keys.
I looked everywhere. My pockets, the cabinet where I put my coat, drawers, floor, garbage can, team table, all through my purse. Can't find 'em.
So I call Kip and tell him, and he says to go out to my car and see if I find them and if not, he'll drive up to Urbana to get into the house and get my spare and come get me.
I trace my steps back to my car (thankful my car was still there).
As I'm crossing the street to my car, I say to my friend (whom I'm on the phone with at the time), 'haha, you know how to break into a car?' And I get to my door and I see that my doors are unlocked. And I was excited because I was thinking I had dropped my keys in my trunk, because I had put a shopping bag in there. So if I had dropped them in there, and my car was unlocked, yay keys! Because I could open the trunk.
So I open the door and I go to get in, and my keys are on the floorboard, with a note, saying that they had been found behind my car and that he hoped they were still here when I got back.
They were. And as far as I can tell, nothing was taken. But damn if that wasn't the most scared I've been in a LONG time.
Me: My shoes have rhinoceroses! Rhinocero…each shoe has a rhinoceros!
Her: *crinkly face* What?
Me: Rhinoceroses! *shows*
Her: Oh geez. You like rhinoceroses?
Me: I LOVE rhinoceroses! I love hippos, too. Hee, they have a stuffed one at Kohl’s, I’m gonna get him.
Her: IT’S THE MOST DANGEROUS ANIMAL IN AFRICA.
Me: BUT THEY’RE SO CUTE!
( and saw this. )
Now maybe they'll understand what we went through and stop bitching at us for being a bunch of lazy bitches.
Is it wrong that that was the first thing on my mind?
Also, these hurricanes are getting all this national coverage and we--a major Midwest city, who was under eight feet of water for a full week -- got ten minutes on GMA, a 3 minute spot on CNN and a 4 minute spot on ABC World News?
She didn't count on me and Tara, though.
She didn't remember that a day called "Thursday" existed.
So, Tara and I discussed. We agreed that our decorations for her (we always celebrate peoples' birthdays! <3) would get meaner exponentially the more she complained about turning 30.
( Oh, did she ever complain. )
Apologies for the crappy quality -- had to use my Blackberry because I haven't charged my camera in um, a week. So, yeah.
Tara is handling the black balloons and eating utensils.
Oh, tomorrow is going to be good. I specifically requested a tombstone. These bakestresses deserve a freaking award for this thing.
Sherry's going to be pissed. I can't wait! Not only is it a great way to celebrate her birthday, but it's also our last day at Norway. ABOUT FREAKING TIME. I feel sorry for my dad because he has been and will continue to be working his butt off this weekend (more than the usual butt-working-off that he does, anyway) and he emailed me earlier today asking me to pick some things up for him and he sounded terribly sorry to have to ask me. But sheesh, I know how hard he's working and he's my daddy. Why wouldn't I help him?
Painting ideas have been finalized: the bathroom will be a cornflowery sort of blue. The sort of blue that can be light blue, medium blue or lavender depending on the light you view it in, with chocolate and white accents. (My accessories are all white ceramic and chrome(<3 antiques) and do you know how expensive that crap is nowadays?) So, yeah. And then the bedroom is going to be a sort of soft, satiny gray. I have light gray and white bedding and red accents, and white and red are my favorite colors (right now, and yes, white is a color, thanks) so this will be perfect. I hope to make my upholstered headboard in the next few weeks, and that will be gray corduroy, slightly darker than my bedding. Yay for matching!
And finally (I'm sure you're bored by this point), I start class tomorrow. Feelings are...unknown. I'm not nervous, I've done too much school to be nervous but I'm...I don't know what I am. I'll tell you tomorrow.
Me: We have to wait another hour and 15 minutes before we get our massages.
Her: What are we going to do?
Her: Do you have a sticky I can use? Or are they…no?
Her: I need the stapler, too.
Me: Sure. -gives- They are community stickies for us, I think. -puts stapler next to her on the table-
Her: How about a pen?
Me: -gives- Do you want any other supplies? Here, have a highlighter. I’ve got some file folders. Rubber bands! DO I LOOK LIKE OFFICE DEPOT?
Her, talking to herself as she works on something: What kind of business is this?
Me: Your mom.
Me: That was probably rude.
Also, she has a habit of randomly either asking me the date or asking me “what do you think?” and I’ve developed the habit of a) giving her a different date every time she asks and b) giving her a random answer every time she asks.
At one point, she spilled her coconut lotion all over our table space we share. Literally, all over. Then she started yelling at certain people, telling them to come over and wipe it off the table with their hands so a) she wouldn't have to clean it up and b) the lotion wouldn't be wasted. I said something about the entire room smelling like a beach now and she said "I'm just trying to turn it into a beach party up in here!"
Her: Smell my bottle.
Her: It stinks! Smell it!
Me: -sniffs, doesn’t really smell anything horrible, maybe just a whiff-
Me: It smells like coconut. I wonder why.
Her: -takes it back, sniffs it again- It smells like stinkbait. It’s gross when you drink it, you can smell it.
Me: Uh…don’t lick the bottle?
Her: I don’t. I’m gonna go wash it.
For a little variety, emails I have sent to a friend of mine over the course of the last couple of weeks:
"Our lights are out again and the electrician is over in the corner on a ladder working on a light, and my dad’s boss just stuck his head in and he’s like “what, you guys like working in the dark better?” And I put my finger in front of my lips and was like “shhh, it’s nap time.” And he goes “Oh, it’s nap time? Okay, you guys get three minutes.”"
"Denny just said something about “you know women, they never pull their weight” to an agent he’s on the phone with… and he’s got Julie and Karen on either side of him, a whole row of women in front of him and four more in the row in front of me. And Julie, Karen (with fly swatter), me, Nancy, Tara, Dorothy and Luanne all turn and look at him and he kinda cowers and is like “…wow” and Karen hit him with the fly swatter, Tara goes “wow.” And I turned to Julie and go “does he realize he’s surrounded?”
Corey’s on the other side of Karen and made a comment and she turns to him w/the swatter and is like “you know what, this works on both sides.”"
"Sherry was saying something to her computer and I was like “…are you speaking to your computer in a British accent?” and she was like “…yes. I am.” And I said “…okay! Just checking!”"
I emailed a co-worker about them, after I saw this sign. This is the same co-worker who sits next to SHERRY THE TABLE SHAKER, but pah. If you email, then no one can hear you, no matter how close you're sitting!
Last Spring ('07) I got a kitten from this woman's sister's litter and that kitten is Moe. I've posted about Moe before. He's a little crazy bundle of fluff who likes to set himself on fire cause trouble, since he's only a year old. So, it's sort of a running joke between us, whenever someone's cat comes up for adoption. I told her about the sign and emailed: “you should get one! : D” Her response was that her husband would divorce her if she brought home a kitten.
Later, she asked where the picture was and went to look at it and she came back and said something “they are soooooo cute," and how she wanted the calico.
And I said, "Well, if you don’t want a kitten, I have an approximately one year old cat you can have. If you overlook the psychotic tendencies, he’s one of the best cats I’ve ever had.”
And she’s like “Oh, that would be the part where he lights himself on fire?”
and I said “…oh...that part, too.”
Friday, we had a baseball game. Well, not work. But CR has a minor league team and every year there's a company outing. Buy a ticket, get good seats with free beer, free pop, free food, popcorn and nuts, etc. Before the game, to "celebrate," we were to wear our "favorite baseball shirts or jerseys" to work.
I'm wondering whose great idea this was. "Hey! I've got it! Let's shove a bunch of Cubs, Cardinals, Giants, Indians, Yankees and Red Sox fans ALL IN ONE ROOM together for six hours! Let's also make sure the room is SUPER hot today and let's steal their fan so they freak out looking for it when they all start to suffocate!"
I have an idea who it was. She will be dealt with accordingly.
The tally was: 6 Cubs shirts (once my manager showed up), 1 Indians shirt, 2 SF Giants shirts, 2 Yankees shirts, 4 Red Sox shirts and 3 Cardinals shirts. See who wins? Yeah, thought so.
But anyway, here's an email I sent to my friend on Friday (TO ESCAPE THE INSANITY), since you people like my conversations so much. I'm telling you, the wit, it's natural:
'Haha, the baseball gangness that’s going on is hilarious. Denny’s on the phone with an agent, making comments about all the cubs fans, I laughed at him and Amanda is like “sorry, I’m on his side” and I was like : O and then she’s like “I don’t like the Cards, either.” And I was like “well, I like the Red Sox, too” and her face drops and she’s like “I’m a Yankees fan!” And Krystal (in a Cards shirt) was standing right here stapling and we were both like “*GASP!!*” And Krystal’s like “the one time cubs and cards fans gang together” and I was like “I thought you were such a nice girl” to Amanda. And then “you really want to sit in the middle of the floor with no desk, don’t you?” and then I turned to Danielle and go “Danielle, I have bad news!” And she goes “what?” And I said “Amanda is a Yankees! fan!” and Danielle’s face just DROPS.
And the branch manager just walked in, wearing a cubs shirt and I gave him a double thumbs up and Denny sees him and goes “OH MY GOD ARE YOU SERIOUS” to the agent and then starts complaining, says he’s going to go to HR complaining and I turn to Andrea and go “this means we win, right?”'
Also, I will have a separate post about the game itself, later. SO MUCH FUN. (Wait, there was a baseball game?)
Random the second:
Yes, I'm posting during the middle of the day. I didn't sleep well last night and my stomach was meh when I woke up so I said "hey, I'm gonna take a sick day!" That's how awesome I am. And now I have a headache from sleeping too long. I'm such a bitch.
Hello! Today is brought to you by the colors yellow (like the sun!) and green (like the trees!) and the nickel I just found in the pocket of my skirt. What's amusing about said nickel is that this is a new skirt and this is the first time I'm wearing it.
See? Target pays me to wear clothes. Trufax.
So, let's see. What haven't I complained about yet? Honestly, there's not much to complain about lately. In fact, things are pretty good! My boss was on vacation for the last two weeks, so work's been good, aside from SHERRY THE TABLE SHAKER. The heat and humidity finally broke late yesterday evening and today is absolutely 100% mondo gorgeous out. It feels much like it did on the 4th. Warm in the sun, cool in the shade with a nice breeze to temper it all out. Not a cloud in the bright blue sky and I can smell grilled food and I can smell burning leaves. Which, you know, is a fall scent but whatevs. It's one of my faves, so I won't complain about it.
I've made two--COUNT 'EM--two new friends in the last week or so, one here (Cassandra <3) and one IRL. Part of me thinks I am only being friends with him because of his SWEET 1955 Ford Thunderbird. I sort of have a thing for old cars. A friend of mine at work has an uncle who's selling a 1957 Ford Fairlane Skyliner hard top convertible, for a not terribly extravagant price, BUT...my new friend, K, his dad owns one of the bigger classic car restorers in the city and they have a 1955 Chevy Bel Air, which, you know, I might be willing to give up my first born for. And it's RED. Gah.
That reminds me. Has anyone else seen the retro Post cereal boxes or the retro M & Ms bags? Because if not, I think I'm going effing crazy. I swear I saw them at the grocery store yesterday but I can't find them, or any reference to them, anywhere online.
P.S. Can you tell I like retro, vintage things?
Right now I'm getting ready to make some (hopefully) tasty gluten-free chocolate chip cookies because, honestly, a girl can only eat so many M&Ms for dessert before getting sick of them.
Speaking of getting sick of things, I'm going to shut up now. Because really, this much sunshine and happiness just makes me ill.
Um. Because I haven't felt like it?
The river crested on Friday and it's going down quickly but it is leaving an immense amount of damage. Immense. There's houses off their foundations, we lost a window in our building, there's a bunch of buildings downtown that lost windows and doors, Hwy 150 heading south into Vinton is just...gone. Same with Hwy 1 heading south out of Mt Vernon to Iowa City. Just, washed away. The sidewalks and roads and pretty cobblestone downtown is all torn up.
So, there's going to be major construction going on for quite some time.
And let's not even talk about all the weird and random things they're finding. I have this feeling, when they let us in to clean our building, I'm going to find a dead cat. I don't know why, I just do.
We have an employee hotline now, so I called that and it's the same as ever -- your supervisor will contact you when we know more. The only thing that worries me is that other branch that works out of our home office and the IS departments have both already met. So I don't know what my department is waiting for but oh well. Nothing I can do about it. My boss has...quite literally, all of my numbers, except for Dave's...and I'm in contact with two of my closest friends from the department, so there's no way I won't know. One of us will find out, damn it.
So today, after I get ready, I'm off to get a tetanus shot (joy of joys. I don't remember and can't find medical records of when I had my last one so I have to get one, in case I get called into clean and I hate them DAMN IT) and then I'm off to get Janet Evanovich's new book today (yes, we may be in the middle of a major natural disaster but I've been waiting a year for this book, goddamn it), maybe with a little Starbucks thrown in and then I'm coming home and...reading. I might hang out in town a bit longer with one of my friends because THE HOUSE IS KILLING ME. Last week, Thursday, Friday, if I hadn't been so freaked out, having a couple days off of work was nice. It's only gone downhill since Saturday. I have no gumption to do anything.
Don't get me wrong, I've done stuff. The normal around the house stuff, laundry, cleaning, mowing, the garbage yesterday. But I'm getting bored. And me bored is not a good thing. I get very tired and cranky when I'm bored for too long because when I'm bored I tend to just lay somewhere and stare at the ceiling.
So, today I will read my book. And yes, I'll read the whole thing today. I do that. And then I'll probably read the 16 other books I still need to read that I haven't been able to because I've been busy with work. And again, I will keep my cell phone by my side, waiting to hear from my supervisor. Because I'm a good employee like that.
Plus, anyone else wanna call? Because damn it, I'm bored. Did I mention that?
I got to stay home from work yesterday because we were in the middle of a massive winter storm when I woke up. I knew this was a possibility the night before when I went to bed but I still set my alarm like a good girl.
Throughout the day we got about two inches of ice, followed by an inch of sleet, followed by about five inches of snow. The big, fat fluffy kind.
Driving to work today will be fun but it will be better than driving home last night would’ve been. I’d STILL be downtown. Even the university near here closed, for the first time in five years, due to weather reasons, along with about three - four dozen other schools and organizations. So, unlike usual, it’s not all in my head. XD
According to Wikipedia (the end all, be all of all knowledge):
An English language idiom for Wednesday is “hump day”, a reference to making it through to the middle of the work week as getting “over the hump”. It is also informally referred to as “the peak of the week”. Another popular tradition in the United States is to wear a sweater vest on this mid-week business day. This has led Wednesday to be referred to as Vestday.
Obviously, I need to invest in some sweater vests. I have clearly been unfashionable up to this point.
Is it me or does it seem like this has been the longest. week. ever? I don’t know why. This week is no different than last week.
Today also marks the arrival of the Holiday Food Season ®. Today, my team at work had a food day for two of my co-worker’s birthdays (one was December 1st, one is December 22nd). I arranged the food day and I would rather have had it closer to the middle of the month BUT, next Wednesday is the company holiday party –whoo de whoo, and the 19th is the “feast day” for my entire floor.
God, don’t these people ever stop eating?
But hey, free lunch, so I won’t complain.
Christmas isn’t about Jesus. Oh no. (Ignoring the fact that Jesus was born in MARCH).
Christmas isn’t even about Santa anymore. Or about presents or good cheer or any of that happy horse puckey.
Didn’t you know?
Christmas is about the CANDY.
My god, the candy.
There’s chocolates and candy canes, starlight peppermints, toffees, taffys, pralines, peppermint bark, almond roca and I could go on and on.
At work, at Halloween, I provided my team (and really, the entire department) with a bucket of candy. I figured, being Christmas, I would provide the same. So there’s a Christmas-type bowl sitting on the table at work and I can’t help but pick from it. Let’s not forget the candy canes I bought to put in the hot chocolate I’ve suddenly become obsessed with drinking. (I’m convinced it’s the super-awesome mug I bought from Starbucks).
This is bad because I’m not a big candy person. I don’t really have a sweet tooth at all and I’m definitely not a picker. So I’ve been picking at this candy and then I get home and don’t want to eat.
And pizza is so much healthier for me.
By the time Christmas is over, I’m going to weigh a gajillion pounds.
And let’s not forget the diabetic coma.