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I went grocery shopping early yesterday morning just like I always do, every two weeks. And after, I stopped at Starbucks, just like I always do... and I've already made the decision to cut myself off cold turkey, because I counted up how much money I've spent there recently (I've been going more than normal) and all I can say is, damn.

So anyway, I walk up to the counter and one of my regular baristas asks me what I want. And I tell her and she's like "I can never guess with you. You always order something different." And I said it was my job to keep her on her toes. And she agrees with me and then says, "Yeah, but you always stick with the same four drinks so at least I have an idea!"

I was thinking, dear god, I need to buy a coffee pot for home.
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Cut to preserve flists. )
Does anyone else find this amusing?
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I've been absolutely freezing all day. Like, blue-fingertips, hood up, cold all day. I almost fell asleep at work because it was so cold; I had to get up and go outside into the sunshine to wake up. And it hasn't gotten better at all. At one point this afternoon, I was wrapped up in my heavy comforter, in addition to having my heavy sweatshirt on it.

Speaking of sweatshirt. The hoodie I'm wearing is for my sorority. Light gray, has red and white letters on it. This just happens to be the sweatshirt I am wearing today.

I walked into Starbucks to get a drink (no one is surprised). Two, slightly-over college age (I guess?) guys were standing by the merchandise, looking up at the menu. They weren't in line, and they were obviously still talking between themselves because, you know, having to choose between a regular mocha and a white mocha frappuccino is a life-altering choice. Clearly. So, I went around them, went up to the line to order. What I heard, quite literally, was something like "one of those snobby, slutty sorority girls, think they own the fucking world and can cut in front of anyone."

What they didn't realize, being the stupid fucking imbeciles that they are is that I could hear them. Surprising, I know, since I was all of four feet away from them. Epic distance, you know?

My eyes connect with the cashier (who knows me because um, I'm there a lot?) and we were both kinda like "are you serious?" And I kinda just turn around and look at them and they all puff up because they think they're so tough and awesome and I will zomg, bow to their power.


I said, "So, I'm a snob and a slut because I'm in a sorority?" And Neanderthal 1 was like "uhh..." And I said, "So, because you see me wearing a sweatshirt with a Greek affiliation, that means you know me and can assume my sexual proclivities?" And the other caveman goes "uhh..." and I said, "Tell me something. Since you're fat and ugly, I should assume that you've never had a girlfriend, right?" And he goes "What! I'm married!" And then I said, "Well, I guess you shouldn't be making stereotypes either, should you?" And then Neanderthal pulled him out of the store.

That kinda made my day.
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"Let's go caroling house to house. And then apartment to apartment. By bus. And by kayak. Why shouldn't everyone get to hear the beauty of our voices?"
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"Once, when excavating the house of a medieval sailor on the coast of the Red Sea in Egypt, I found a still-preserved reed mat in front of a door. Under the doormat was a wooden key with the name of the owner painted on it. It was an extraordinary sense of connection with the last person to walk out of that building 700 years ago."

--Fred Hiebert

Archaeologist and National Geographic Fellow


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December 2011

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