Who knew sleeping could be so dangerous?

I almost DIED this morning not really. Last week, my kitten, Mr. Asshole, Moe, broke a perfume bottle. Thought it would be fun to knock it off the bureau and see what happens. IT BROKE, MOE, THAT’S WHAT HAPPENED. This is also the kitteh who eats eyeglasses and sits on gas stove burners, while they’re on.

I didn’t say he was a smart kitten.

So, he knocks over the perfume bottle but it looked like it broke into four big chunks, so I picked those up and tossed them away and the bedroom smelled overbearingly like that perfume for a week. Yay carpet!

Apparently, a small nugget of glass got into the bed. I rolled over at about 4:15 this morning and felt something sharp. Reached down and felt my leg and it and my fingers now, were wet. So I hopped out of bed (my first and foremost concern was getting blood on my PRISTINE white sheets–which happened, damn it) and turned on the light and yep, blood everywhere. Four small cuts, in a perfect line, along the side of my thigh. The bleeding’s slowed a bit, but I don’t think it’s stopped yet.

This is a really great way to start a Thursday. I recommend it for everyone.